#IDK MAN YOU EVER THINK ABOUT HOW
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crows-bite · 7 months ago
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Been thinking so much about Marigold specifically in the ORP universe so I’m obligated to come make a whole post to explain some of my thoughts.
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I don’t knowwww I just think a lot about how Maverick was. Very clearly loved by this woman. Like they still carry that love with them in little ways, they’ve been marked by it forever you know? Like she was not their mother, and their relationship was very non conventional but she was like. As Good As a mother to them. I think she saw herself like a mother even if Mav never saw her that way. It kills me because their relationship in ORP is honestly much less complicated and a lot better than it is in canon. Marigold is like… well tbh I can’t get into it because spoilers but she is very morally questionable and kinda fucked up but like her care for Mav is still very much there.
I wouldn’t be able to say for sure but I honestly don’t think it’s out of the question that in ORP she died getting in the way of The Dread and trying to give Mav the best chance possible at running. But like MAV DOESN’T KNOW THAT and it’s fucked them up so badly. Because they never looked back, man. They just ran immediately and even if it’s what she would’ve wanted them to do they just fully believe they left her for dead.
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Like. Ok. Atp Mav is just of the mindset of like. That loss hurt so badly because what do you do when you’ve got nobody else and the one person in the world that loves you like family dies and you think it’s your fault, you know? But they’ve just got this anger about the whole situation. Angry at themself but also angry at her because if she hadn’t died they’d still have somebody. It’s just really soured their whole perception of her isn’t that nuts. As if she did it on purpose. (THE THING IS SHE KINDA DID OUT OF LOVE AND THEY DON’T KNOWWWW THEY DON’T EVEN KNOWWW) and now all of those feelings have just been reinforced x100 being with the Brooks family because they don’t have that. And maybe they would if Marigold were still alive.
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tubbytarchia · 8 months ago
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Missed drawing these two too
Bonuses
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silusvesuius · 5 months ago
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nnnnnnnnnnnnno maa'am
#my want to draw traditionally literally split me open for the past week and leaves me literally depressed i'm so serious i can't even look -#- @ my art programs without wanting to throw up omfg should;ve never picked up those pencils#but it's ok i just needed a nap#something so relatable about them i think nelvas has something in it for everyone meanwhile eltl is secluded art museum.#it's very possible to walk around in neloth's and talvas' brains but eltl is off limits. they will NOT! get no drawings like this outta me#wtf r they thinking ........#< eltl not nelvas#something nobody on dis earth can understand ..........#talvas wants to live he likes living but neloth's presence is so strong that it overrides and deletes his will to live.#bruuuuuuuuh#i bet the feeling of neloff is in everything he does if they ever part ways he won't be able to fold clothes or anythign without wanting -#- 2 cry . for what reason . idk bc neloth once yelled at him for folding clothes like shit .what am i on rn#(talvas thoughts mode) I want this old man to hug meeee😢😢😢#NELOFF DO IT and smash him too before i do it first .#me and neloth are the same person tho so it doesn;t matter but w/e#i'm getting emotional over them right now this cannot be real#i love her .... (Skyr1m)#i opened the game for .5 minutes today to take pics of a character uight what a beautiful game.#Te/s having such extensive lore ruins the whole entire game and the franchise but whatever . skyr1m is an art piece that's just how i feel#also this might be a very hard pill to swallow for some people but t*lvas is literally a kin Vessel for young women that keep getting -#- hit on by men twice or thrice their age when they're just trying to live their life .#this feels so profound to me i need dis shit inmy discord bio right NOEW.#Talvas................................#(eyes watering) (holding palm out)#suicide //#just in case but this tag would've gone crazy with my drawings of ulfr*c from late 2022 where i drew him with slit wrists. very artsay#is it not. i didn't like neither of those drawings tho i need to revisit cus i can feel ulfr*c on a diffaraaant level#when will i run out of tags. the way you can tell i just LUH talvas look at me drawing his hair in that second pic 😑BRU#look at me also trying to replicate pencils digitally in the first.. hmmm i don't hate it#at least it soothes me and i don't have pencil withdrawal
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shithowdy · 2 months ago
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realized a drawing i'm doing rn is almost identically posed to one i did 8.5 years ago of a different oc, except the old drawing was instantly tainted by one of the players featured messaging me asking if i could take it down because their abusive, possessive rp partner saw it and got jealous of them "roleplaying behind their back" and i said "nah" and it became a whole Thing that i should have walked away from at that exact moment but didn't and the 6 months that followed contained some of the most truly condensed batshit i have ever witnessed in an rp community already well-known for its batshittery.
... anyway i love my friends. so happy to accidentally redeem the pose.
#idk if ill ever open up completely about that shitshow but#i think 8 years is past the statute of limitations to vaguepost about it#late tag addition but man now i'm thinking about it all at 4am#how did in the good goddamn did i witness that and still not only let them make me an officer#but also let them put me functionally in charge of their guild IC#while those two fucked off and erped in instanced zones or played overwatch#and i and my then-rp-partner took the heat for the meandering plotline#until my partner vented to the wrong person about the abuse#and it got back to them#and we got to experience the surreality of an honest to god guild coup#all to salvage the image of some egomaniac abuser#certified fucking wra moment#its been 8 years and thinking about how i was treated in the end makes me feel sick lol#they made a new guild discord and invited everyone but us#and when i noticed the channel had gone quiet i asked what was up#and was met with gaslighting about how i'm 'thinking too much' about the channel being a 'little slow'#and it took pushing to get an early admission of what was about to happen#so we logged on and quit ourselves#which fucked up the narrative they had constructed#and they lied in the new channel that WE were the ones doing a 'coup' and that we stole the members who left with us#i guess i am opening up after all#i had to play the fucking villain of that scenario for the past 8 years#all to protect the mental health of people who hurt me#why#if you were there and know what i'm referencing with all of this... there's the fucking story#the person in question is a massively popular artist#i just dont have it in me to fight that fight
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gameboyhamazing · 2 years ago
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thinking abt the inherent tragedy of being in timeloops in a setting (game, franchise, etc.) where half the value is getting attached and sharing experiences with ppl but bc of the timeloops they never remember the experiences you had and may in fact never meet you again because it hurts you too much to try and relate to them again
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pigswithwings · 1 year ago
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web weave of the ocean?
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Ships and the Sea
Sources: Original Poetry 🌊 Illustration for "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner", Gustave Doré 🌊 "Storm on the Azov Sea", Ivan Aivazovsky 🌊 Original Poetry 🌊 @/maybe-itsforthebest 🌊 "Point Bonita Lighthouse", Frederick Ferdinand Schafer 🌊 Eragon (Inheritance #1), Christopher Paolini 🌊 Original Poetry 🌊 Illustration for "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner", Gustave Doré 🌊 Original Poetry
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sunnykeysmash · 1 year ago
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Man of words
#s16 spoilers#iasip#it's always sunny in philadelphia#always sunny#macdennis#analysis#parallels#I didn't exactly know how to name this thread but i had some scattered thoughts on it#dennis is the one mac depends on to define things. he's the man of words. but this situation is very limiting#firstly because mac can't read subtext. and dennis will rarely be open in his words. but he also doesn't know everything.#cant define everything. and by forcing the situation to have dennis speak for both. what actually happens is mac gets silenced#and when mac cant speak. no one besides dennis can ever possibly understand him. and that is very isolating. because den wont be open. cant#but they trust each other. theyre following each other's lead. and they're missing the right words#den defines his own self worth in the relationship by being able to have the right words. mac is the man of action! after all#but if mac learns to speak for himself. if mac doesn't depend on den (chokes). if mac is noticed for his appearance as den becomes insecure#(''what if my shirt falls off?'') what does den have left for mac? but mac will fall for him no matter what.#''make up or not you are the golden god! it's all about what's in here💗''#maybe words arent necessary anymore. dont ask just do. and mac's the man of action... OR IS HE.#mac doesn't really act now does he. they got it backwards. don't they? mac got a lot better with his words in time...#idk lots to think about let me know what u think lolll#threads
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i3utterflyeffect · 5 months ago
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What if one day, Alan came home early, insisted that Chosen would stay to dinner, and they have big family dinner together? And everything so surreal for Chosen, so when they come back home, Dark can't stop asking Cho why they look so stunned.
god yeah-- i don't think he'd insist on chosen staying personally but there's no way SC doesn't beg them to stay--
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worstloki · 3 months ago
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Fortesa Latifi, We Were Young
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chaoticlandworlder · 4 months ago
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What is with the practically psychotic hate for Lance Stroll? I'm not even his fan- more indifferent- but the hate he gets is sickening. Like just see the recent 'Never have I ever' vid- so many top comments on youtube, instagram etc. are just spouting shit about him (attacking his looks, calling him window licker wtf etc.) based off the 'Never have I ever stood up someone question' (and of course they conveniently ignore all the other drivers that also said they have because it's trendy to hate on Stroll).
Of course, standing up someone sucks but first of all we have no context at all, and more importantly, it's clear the commenters don't actl give a shit about that because they're only hating on Stroll. This is literally just one instance of the way these F1 'fans' are so quick to seize any opportunity to put down Lance. Honestly, it's so off-putting, pathetic and sad.
#he's not even one of my faves but the hate in the f1 fanbase for this 25 year old is crazy#don't give me the 'his daddy bought the team!! he's so shitty!!'#he may not be the best driver but he's still a good driver#he got a podium in his rookie year for goodness sake#also one of the youngest polesitter#yes he was blessed with a rich family but god forbid a father loves his child and would do anything for him#he's usually good in the wet/mixed conditions too#but if you listened to ppl on social media you would think lance can't even walk in a straight line#im so done lol the f1 fanbase is so toxic#esp those on twitter/insta#honestly I doubt those type of 'fans' actl watch the races#they just do monkey see monkey do#and hate on a fucking mid-20s dude 💀#their lives must be incredibly sad to waste time spreading hate like that#lance stroll#f1 2024#honestly this isn't even about the never have I ever vid#it's more about the general and practically fervent hate ppl have for lance#which is so overboard#lance puts in the effort everyday but these ppl will have you believe he sits arnd throwing moneg everyday#this is the man who drove despite his hand injury last year for goodness' sake#the way some ppl talk about him will have you thinking he murdered their family#also he's just thr to drive??? idk why ppl go all up in arms to hate on everything he does from his looks to how he talks...#and in general the hate various drivers get is so weird#*money#<- too lazy to edit my tags lol
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edwinisms · 4 months ago
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#this question is very hard for me to answer so obviously I have to torment everyone else with it#cause like. like I can really see the potential in either answer. both are feasible#I will say. most realistically. to me. edwin first charles harder#because I think…..I think the reasoning behind the other way around usually tends to be about how edwin absolutely was slower to bond and#open up in general whereas charles hit the ground fucking running#but i don’t think that particularly applies to their romantic relationship#if you mean ‘fell for’ in a general sense rather than a romantic one then yes 100%#but that’s not what im talking about here#I have a few different reasons but generally I think edwin fell first because like… the way he attached himself to charles and accepted him#as his person and etc is so unlike him to do with literally anyone- especially at the point where they first met/the first years they knew#each other. charles just seems to have hit him as something very very special and irreplaceable quite quickly for him to open up the way he#did and change and flourish into a fully realized person because of how safe and worthy charles made him feel#he took to charles with an unusual amount of ease and trust and I think that says something about how charles struck his heart Early#whereas with charles… yes on one hand he did stay on the mortal plane largely because of edwin and absolutely would’ve been impacted by the#tender act of mercy that was edwin reading to him as he died so he wouldn’t be scared. that’s absolutely what got him to trust edwin and to#want to be with him and protect him and so on#but charles would still do that and be like that under intense platonic circumstances I think#but most importantly I just think charles fell harder. when he fell is less important to me here- more important is that by GOD that boy is#down so fucking bad and outright SAYS IT in so many ways that he doesn’t realize– the sheer amount he restates how he’s content so long as#he’s with edwin. how he doesn’t want to be anywhere where edwin can’t follow. would and Did go to hell and back for him. believes him#to be the kindest and most incredible person he’s ever met. prioritizes him above anything and everything. etc etc etc#that’s not to say edwin doesn’t feel a similar amount of devotion– but charles just. really loves him with his whole person. loves him as a#fact of his existence and a piece of his very soul#idk man. it just feels like he is so incredibly smitten and he doesn’t even know it.#like I said though I can see both options and give reasons for both options so this question EATS at me I GENUINELY don’t have a super#strong feeling either is absolutely correct. it’s so difficult to answer they’re both so smitten and have such a history and GRAHHHH#payneland#dead boy detectives#rambling#polls
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thebirdandhersong · 1 month ago
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Lol
#theres nothing quite like your mother saying Well maybe you shouldve been more careful because now your boss might think youve been flirting#with this male coworker (whom i like splendidly as a friend) and now maybe she thinks youre not trustworthy#and maybe she regrets hiring you because you said you feel like youre making a lot of mistakes this week and she might assume thats because#your head is filled with this boy.#so dont make her regret hiring you.#MA'AM I TOLD YOU I WAS ALREADY ANXIOUS BECAUSE I MADE SO MANY MISTAKES TODAY WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME ASHAMED#OF SOMETHING THAT I HONESTLY HAD NO CLUE I OUGHT TO BE ANXIOUS ABOUT AT MY FIRST NEW JOB AFTER IVE GRADUATED????#anyway going to bed i cant take this anymore LOL she said it so lightly and im like. well i never even considered#being afraid of making my boss regret hiring me somehow because of some kind of behaviour that i had no idea was sending some kind of signal#anywaysssss 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#and then she was like why are you crying?? 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀#not to be like this is partly why i didnt want to move home but confound it all why are things like this#can i not simply confide in my mother my anxieties and worriws#worries#and not also have to worry about her potentially being like Well have you considered you ARE right and it IS your fault?#idk man something something firstborn child eldest daughter can i have some room to breathe. please#also not to whine but Not my father walking in on me eating dinner at 10pm because i was holed up#in my room in a semi depressive state after so many gong shows in a work day and straight up having no appetite#but deciding my body needs the food anyway its better late than never.....walking in and then saying#you know if you eat this late you'll gain weight. SIR??????????????????#sorry to complain and rant again i simply cannot in this house and whats more am doing my best to honour my parents#but why is it so hard out here and how can they say stuff like that with a smile!!!!!!!#also i DO have an inner critic who is always like Its your fault you are the worst you should be ashamed always........why do my parents#not understand after knowing me for so long and watching me grow up#that i can make myself so ashamed of the smallest thing so easily and that what they say drives me to shame almost as easily?#ANYWAY LOL WHAT A DAY#you guys!!! i am working so hard i promise i PROMISE I am!!! it is my first full time job ever and i am working so so hard#i am doing my absolute best and no one sees it and that is FINE i just wish my parents would see that i AM trying!!#i come back home so dead every single day because i put in 120%! this is literally my first job after graduation#and my parents KNOW this has been the most exhausting taxing and soul crushing year ive had in my very short life so far
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I haven't even watched the movie yet
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crabbunch · 2 years ago
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woahhhhhh moons big.
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questioning sexuality is so exhausting
#(edit: sorry for the rant in the tags and i just. i want someone to talk to me)#i keep on doing it for no apparent reason#someone was talking about lust yesterday and i realised today that.#even tho id thought i don't experience it. i possibly do. but exclusively towards women.#i hate it here!#for a multitude of reasons i will never have a relationship with a woman but! i may be incapable of having a relationship with a man!#at some point in the last few months i have abruptly pivoted from definitely wanting marriage and kids to being ambivalent on marriage#and not wanting kids. that's such an outlier in my life that it might just be a mental health thing tho idk#but at the same time i. want to be loved.#i don't know what i want anymore and im tired of questioning myself#i definitely overthink it but idk how to stop it#and i hate hate hate how the moral obsessions have bee lately#this isn't entirely related but it kind of is#like Am i a terrible morally bankrupt person for having certain thoughts or is it just religious ocd go brrrr?? am i overthinking it?#i don't know. i don't know!#for a while labelling myself as arospec ace kinda calmed that down but. i don't know#i do't want to be attracted to women. i don't want to have to look away so often. i don't want any of that.#but i don't know how to stop it.#i don't even know if i'm attracted to men at all.#this is a cry for help and encouragement and prayers no matter what your views on these matters are#queer stuff tag#i nearly fessed up to my friend yesterday about same sex attraction and i might've except that it would have probably outed me as#the person who anonymously sent in a question several months ago about the side b movement to a church thing#ive only told one person at church about any of that sort of stuff and it was very vaguely worded#also see: this friend is the mother of the boy i?? i don't even know how i feel about him#i increasingly think it wasn't romantic at all. but i don't know#i would love any encouragement you got. anything at all.#i don't know how much this stuff is affected by the fact that i consider myself unloveable and think it highly unlikely any boy will ever#care for me#now im rambling. sorry
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yuridovewing · 4 months ago
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i understand the frustration with “i made this gay pairing cis x trans so they can still have biological babies” with no thought to other methods and how ppl assume thats the case when it comes to mothpool aus where mothwing is also the mother of the three, but also…. idk i kinda dont give a shit if someone wants to do that and i dont really think its inherently transphobic as long as its handled with care and respect.
what really concerns me about this debate is how some people are adamant that you cannot portray trans people having biological children in media or youre being disrespectful. and im gonna say as a nonbinary person who doesnt want children for themself- thats kinda fucking weird? like i understand that for some people, theyre trans themselves and theyre speaking from a place of dysphoria, and i absolutely get that, which is why i think the topic should be handled with nuance and diversity in trans characters, but like…. guys. pregnant trans men exist irl. trans women get people pregnant irl. trans ppl’s ability and right to parent and have biological children are being debated irl. we get denied the opportunity to adopt as well.
in a climate like this, are we SURE we want the stance on rewrites and headcanons in the silly cat books to be “if you portray trans characters having children, especially with a gay couple, youre a transphobic freak no matter what!” does it really matter? especially if its being done by a trans person handling the topic with nuance who has a lot of trans characters with varying perspectives?
obviously yes, remember that thats not the only way certain gay couples can have kids, remember that not every trans person is fully comfortable with it and keep that in mind, remember that surrogacy and adoption are also perfectly valid ways to give fan babies- but remember that there are OPTIONS. not that you need to condemn the idea of transgender parents in the first place unless they fit the very specific criteria of “proper transgender representation” and anything that dares deviate from that is proof the op is a transphobic monster (bonus points if theyre a trans creator bc i mostly see trans people getting shit for this and it kinda pisses me off. although idm if cis people do it either as long as theyre handling it with respect)
#and this isnt getting into how trans mothwing outside of mothpool is a really good way to read her character#sorry. remembered the shit bonefall got despite being trans as well and got annoyed#that especially annoys me bc hes got plenty of surrogacies but the second hed touch a trans pregnancy#‘’no you cant do that!!! you freak!!! obviously you only see trans people as a loophole for gays to have babies!!!’’#also my gf and i were talking and obviously take this with a grain of salt bc this is our experience#but…. i think a lot of the ppl saying this……. havent really talked to trans women?#dude some of the ones i know LOVE the idea of getting people pregnant#did you know trans women have sex? did you know trans people in general have sex?? did you know trans people irl wanna start families?#did you know that? did you? or do you black out at the idea of a trans woman being anything but strictly pure and nonsexual#and OBVIOUSLY this is not every trans woman. some do have dysphoria around the idea#but im genuinely starting to wonder how these people act around irl transgender parents#whether they had kids before or after coming out#bc ngl. the attitude that thinking about this makes you a transphobic pervert?#directed at trans people making content for themselves?#im starting to think you all just dont want us to reproduce. if we reproduce we arent ‘’good’’ trans people#because a ‘’real’’ man wouldnt carry a child. a ‘’real’’ woman would carry the child. and god forbid the gays even THINK about reproducing#and being around children!#if we have children then we’re doing things that might make cishets look at us and declare we’re not perfect#we’ve proved we’re not just identical to cis ppl!! (and therefore deserving of respect!)#idk. i think this was mostly a case of tumblr going ‘’oh someone said no to this so lets push this to an unhealthy extreme!!’’#and i cant help but notice nobody really brings up nonbinary parents at all in this discussion#not that we have it ‘’better’’ or anything for that but yknow. are we supposed to swear it off?#is the idea of us having kids inconcievable? or worse…. does it mean we ‘’picked a side?’’#so its not even worth getting mad at a pregnant nb person bc ‘’well thats a woman so who cares’’b#HMMMMM.#ohhhh i bet they also get mad if you make transfem pregnancy possible too. no winning#idk really think about it when you go ‘’you can NEVER EVER portray a trans person starting a family. bc REAL trans people would never.’’#ohhh you probably get mad when trans ppl dont get surgery for one reason or another dontcha#whether we want to or its not in the cards for us for whatever reason like cost and such#(while also getting mad if we do bc we cannot win in this no matter what)
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